I originally started blogging as a way to pass the time while the husband was gone and share my experience of handling a deployment… and it seems this blog may be returning to its roots far sooner than expected.
Nick returned from Iraq at the end of July, and it is the ARNG’s policy that units are only deployed once every 5 years from TN. Of course we never believed this to be true, and when the rumors started circling the unit that the next deployment would come in 2012 to Afghanistan, we weren’t surprised at all.
What I didn’t expect was the text message I received from Nick while he was at drill Sunday and I was at work. He told me that we needed to talk asap, because he was thinking of volunteering for a deployment to Afghanistan with a different unit in June.
My heart sank. My stomach felt queasy. I didn’t even know how to respond.
We had a long talk about this possibility on Sunday night… why he wants to do it, the benefits to his career with the Army, and the sacrifices it meant for our relationship. Again. One of the hardest things about being a military wife is trying to be supportive and strong when you’re terrified of the future. Nick absolutely loves the military and is much happier serving his country than any other job you could offer him here, and I love him too much to deny him happiness in life.
Do I want to cry and scream and tell him there’s no way in hell I’m letting him go? Of course I do. But instead I let him hold me and promise that he’ll come back, he’ll always come back.
Nothing at all is definite yet… he’s still trying to learn more about the unit he would be deploying with and the mission they would be focused on. For now I’m embracing every moment we spend together, because as a military wife you learn to never take those moments for granted. You never know how long you have together, and you want as many memories as you can hold to carry you through the long months apart from the one you love
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