need an update?

9:12:00 PM Unknown 0 Comments

I don’t mean to be MIA so often, but I can’t seem to catch up with life these days. I work, I sleep, I work, I squeeze in a doctor’s appt (or two or three), and work again. It has been a nice distraction from reality… or maybe just a successful attempt at avoiding the cards that life has dealt.

So you know by now that Nick and I have wanted a baby, have been trying for a baby for far too long, and have yet to conceive that baby. What you may not know is that not only has the fertility testing begun, but it’s in full swing these days.

Unfortunately, the results haven’t been great.

We have no definitive answers yet… we’re always waiting for results from the next test they’ve come up with… but my doctor is optimistic, and that makes me optimistic. It seems that Clomid may be in the near future, assuming the little swimmers make straight A’s on their final exam, and hopefully that’s all it will take. Sometimes the results we receive seem like good news, but most of the time the entire process and discovering that a completely “natural” conception will never happen for us is completely disheartening and borderline disturbing. If I focus too much on it (as I have so many days recently), I am a complete mess.

So for now I’m keeping it vague… mostly for my own sanity. If I discuss the details of what we’ve learned and what has yet to be determined, I will be forced to face reality again. And honestly, I just don’t feel like it.